Why did the gopher go to therapy? To get to the root of its problems.
What’s a gopher’s favorite type of music? Any genre with deep bass.
What do you get when you cross a gopher and a singer? A tunnel-visioned tenor.
What’s a gopher’s science degree? Soil-ology.
What’s a gopher’s favorite holiday? Dearth Day.
What’s a gopher’s favorite city? Birming-hamster.
How do gophers make decisions? They dig deeper into the matter.
Why was the gopher a great detective? It followed every burrowed lead.
What’s a gopher’s favorite vegetable? Ground peas.
What’s a gopher’s favorite instrument? The digeridoo.
Why was the gopher so good at baseball? It had a killer digging arm.
Why did the gopher bring a shovel to the party? Because it wanted to dig the scene.
Why did the gopher start a blog? To share its dirt on life.
Why did the gopher join the band? It was great at rock and hole.
What do you get when you cross a gopher and a pirate? A burrow-blundering swashbuckler.
How do gophers cheer each other up? They dig up some dirty jokes.
How do gophers do math? They count in mounds.
What do gophers read for fun? Dirt-ective novels.
What’s a gopher’s morning routine? Get up, rise and burrow.
Why did the gopher go to art school? It wanted to master hole-painting.
Why was the gopher always happy? It saw life’s ups and downs as mole-hills.
What’s a gopher’s worst fear? A ground-breaking disaster.
What do you call a gopher who writes novels? A best-burrow author.
What’s a gopher’s favorite dance? The Mole-cumbia.
What’s a gopher’s dream job? A mining engineer.
How do gophers stay fit? Tunneling exercises.
Why did the gopher get promoted? It really dug into its work.
Why did the gopher become a doctor? It had a talent for digging out splinters.
How do gophers greet each other? “Hi, hole are you?”
What’s a gopher’s favorite movie? “Groundhogs Day.”
Why was the gopher a great musician? It always hit the right dirt note.
Why did the gopher join the circus? It loved digging under the Big Top.
What do you call a gopher with acarrot? A hole-in-one.
Where do gophers fan out their summer vacations? Tunnel Vision Island.
What’s a gopher’s favorite superhero? Dig-gle.
Why did the gopher avoid the library? Too many bookworms.
What’s a gopher’s political stance? Always neutral-ground.
What’s a gopher’s go-to fashion? Earth tones.
Why do gophers make great friends? They’re always down to earth.
Why did the gopher break up with thesquirrel? It needed more space to dig.
Why don’t gophers lie? They believe in ground truth.
What’s a gopher’s favorite day of the week? Digs-day.
What’s a gopher’s favorite website? Digg.com
How do gophers win arguments? They dig up all the facts.
What do you call a fancy gopher? A tux-edged burrower.
What do gophers say before a big meal? “Let’s dig in!”
What’s a gopher’s favorite drink? Root beer.
What’s a gopher’s favorite game? Whack-a-mole.
Why don’t gophers use the internet? Because they’d rather surf the burrow-net.
What’s a gopher’s favorite dessert? Ground cake.
Why was the gopher so calm? It was always grounded.
What does a gopher use to fix its house? A groundhog stapler.
How does a gopher stay cool in the summer? It digs the underground breeze.
What’s a gopher’s favorite social media? Tunnelgram.
What did the gopher say to the mole? “You’re a hole lot of fun!”
Why did the gopher get promoted? Its work was ground-breaking.
What did the gopher say after a long run? “I’m burrow-ed out!”
Why did the gopher build a skyscraper? To give its friends a high burrow.
Why did the gopher bring a shovel to the party? Because it always loves to dig in!
How did the gopher feel when it won the lottery? Ground-breaking!
What’s a gopher’s favorite kind of story? A hole-some story.
What’s a gopher’s favorite instrument? A submarine.
What’s a gopher’s favorite holiday? Earth Day.
What’s a gopher’s favorite beverage? Root beer.
Why was the gopher so good at gardening? It had a green paw.
What’s a gopher’s favorite movie? Burrow-al Instinct.
Why did the gopher start a podcast? To talk about hole-y matters.
What do you call a gopher who loves music? A rock-n’-roll digger!
What did the comedian gopher say? “I can dig this crowd!”
How do gophers stay in shape? They do ground workouts.
What’s a gopher’s favorite dessert?Chocolatechipmunk cookies.
What’s a gopher’s favorite dance move? Theworm.
Why was the gopher a great reporter? It always got the scoop.
What do you call a noble gopher? Lord of the burrows.
What’s a gopher’s least favorite vegetable? Groundlettuce.
What’s a gopher’s favorite game? Groundhog Day.
Why did the gopher join a band? Because it had great rythm-dirt.
How do gophers make friends? They dig their personalities.
Why did the gopher bring a pillow? To rest after a hole day of digging.
What do you get when you cross a gopher with a 80’s band? Duran Duran Gopher.
What’s a gopher’s dream job? A dig-tective.
How do gophers stay connected? Hole Phones.
Why did the gopher go to the library? It wanted to check out a hole book.
Why did the gopher bring a flashlight? It didn’t want to be left in the dark hole.
What’s a gopher’s favorite TV show? Dig House.
What’s a gopher’s favorite weather? Underground sunny.
What did the gopher say to its mentor? “You’re un-burrow-lievable!”
What did the gopher say when the hole collapsed? “That’s un-burrow-lievable!”
How do you apologize to a gopher? “I dig you, and I’m sorry.”
What did the gopher say to the other gopher on vacation? Dig it easy!
What’s a gopher’s favorite workout? Ground cycling.
What did the gopher say when it found treasure? “This is gold!”
Why did the gopher carry a backpack? It had a lot of dirt to carry.
What’s a gopher’s favorite book series? The Hole-y Potter.
What’s a gopher’s favorite type of music? Under-ground hip-hop.
How do gophers greet each other? “Hole-you-doing?”
What did the gopher say to its sleepy friend? “You need more hibernation!”
What’s a gopher’s favorite school subject? Geo-dig-aphy.
Why was the gopher a great friend? It always had your back in the ground.
Why did the gopher buy a new coat? It wanted a fur-tastic cover.