Why did the squirrel read romance novels? He was nuts about love stories.
Why would a squirrel join a band? To play the nuts.
How do you call a squirrel that’s into clothes? A fashion-nut.
Why did the squirrel apply for a loan? To buy a new nut-house.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite figure of speech? Hyper-nut-ole.
What do squirrels like to read? Nutspapers!
What is a squirrel’s favorite snack? Peanut butter, of course.
What do you call a squirrel with a map? A navigator-nut.
Why did the squirrel get a part-time job? To earn more nut-cash.
What does a squirrel use to surf the Internet? A nutbook.
Why did the squirrel wear a tuxedo? For a nutworthy occasion.
How does a squirrel defend itself? Nut-crackers.
Why did the squirrel fail the driving test? He was too nuts behind the wheel.
How do squirrels keep their money? In a nut bank.
What’s a squirrel’s worst nightmare? Nut shortage.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite board game? Nut-scrabble.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite instrument? Nut-ar.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite TV channel? Nut-Geo Wild.
Why did the squirrel sit on the light bulb? He wanted a little light reading.
What do you call a squirrel that can sing? A rock’n’roll-er!
How do you make a squirrel smile? Tell it a nut joke.
What’s a squirrel’s hobby? Nut-based crafting.
How do you describe a squirrel having a good day? It’s nuts!
Why did the squirrel go to school? To nuture his education.
How does a squirrel propose marriage? With an acorn ring.
How does a squirrel travel? Acorn car.
Why was the squirrel excited for Halloween? Free nut-y treats!
How do you organize a space squirrel party? You planet.
Why did the squirrel stay at the bar? He liked the nut atmosphere.
How does a squirrel work out? Nut-er-cise.
How do you cheer up a squirrel? Remind him of his nutty friends.
How do squirrels start their mornings? With a nut-buttered toast.
Why did the squirrel bring a suitcase? He was going on a nut-cation.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite Disney movie? Nut-Beauty and the Beast.
What’s a squirrel’s dream job? A nutritionist.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite movie quote? You had me at nut!
What do you call a squirrel that’s good at football? A goal-nut.
Why was the squirrel late for work? He was caught in a nut jam.
What’s a squirrel’s mantra? Keep calm and nut on.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite music genre? Nut-metal.
How do squirrels keep cool in the summer? They enjoy nut ice cream.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite invitation? Join us for a nutty evening.
How do squirrels communicate? Nut-ifications!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite subject? Hist-o-nut.
Why was the squirrel feeling grumpy? He hadn’t found his nut fix yet.
Why did the squirrel throw away his alarm clock? It was driving him nuts.
How do you make a squirrel rich? Invest in nut-stock.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite sport? Nut-billiards.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite way to pay? Nut card.
Why was the squirrel at the hospital? A case of nutritis.
Why did the squirrel sit on a computer? To keep an eye on its nuts.
What do squirrels use to write letters? Pen-nuts.
What did the squirrel say after winning the lottery? I’m nuts-rich!
How did the squirrel impress his date? With his nut-ural charm.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite movie? The Nutty Professor.
What’s the best way to share a joke with a squirrel? Just nut and say it.
Why did the squirrel cross the road? To prove it wasn’tchicken.
Why did the squirrel wear glasses? To improve its nut-sight.
What do you call a squirrel that loves to fight? A squarrel.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite ice cream? Rocky road.
Why don’t squirrels play cards in the forest? They’re afraid ofcheetahs.
Why did the squirrel attend school? To get a higher tree-gree.
Why did the squirrel avoid the library? Too much squirrelly silence!
Why did the squirrel refuse to play hide and seek? It felt too squirrely.
How do squirrels compose songs? With their acorn-ion.
Why did the squirrel bring a ladder to the bar? To get to the high nuts!
Why are squirrels so good at acrobatics? They love to be airborne.
What type of event do squirrels throw? A nut-ty party.
How do squirrels communicate? They use Morse acorn.
What did the baby squirrel say to its parent? I’m furr-y happy!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite type of story? A nut-ical tale.
What kind of shoes do squirrels wear? Cashew-al shoes.
Why don’t squirrels like fast cars? They’re afraid they’ll crack under the pressure.
What kind of dance do squirrels prefer? The Nutcracker Ballet.
Why did the squirrel go to space? To find some star-nuts.
Why are squirrels always happy? They believe every day is nut-tiful.
How do you make a squirrel laugh? Tell it a corny joke.
What did the squirrel major in at college? Nut-ural sciences.
How do you catch a friendly squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite dish? Nut roast.
What do you call an attractive squirrel? An acorn babe.
Why did the squirrel bring a suitcase to the tree? It was going on a nut-cation.
What do you call a squirrel in the rain? A wet nut.
What motivates a squirrel to work out? To stay in peak nut-shape.
What type of music do squirrels listen to? Anything with a lot of high notes!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite piece of furniture? The nut-stand.
Why don’t squirrels tell secrets in the forest? Because there are too many eavesdroppers!
What did the squirrel do when it found a treasure map? Follow the peanut trail.
Why don’t squirrels make good DJs? They always go nuts with the beats!
How do squirrels avoid getting lost? They always carry a nut-compass.
How do squirrels get their exercise? By nut-tercizing.
Why do squirrels love slim trees? They’re easy to grasp.
What’s a squirrel’s dream job? Being a nutritionist.
What do squirrels eat for breakfast? Nutflakes.
Why do squirrels hate wind? It messes up their fur style.
What did the squirrel say to its significant other? I’m nuts about you!
Why did the squirrel become a detective? It had a nose for nutty cases.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite sauce? Peanutbutter.
How did the squirrel fix his broken nutcracker? With a little nut-tape.
How do squirrels celebrate their birthday? With lots of nut-cream cake.
Why did the squirrel refuse to play hide and seek? It felt too squirrely.
How do squirrels compose songs? With their acorn-ion.
Why did the squirrel sit on a computer? To keep an eye on its nuts.
What do squirrels use to write letters? Pen-nuts.
Why don’t squirrels make good DJs? They always go nuts with the beats!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite piece of furniture? The nut-stand.
Why did the squirrel become a detective? It had a nose for nutty cases.
How do squirrels get their exercise? By nut-tercizing.
Why don’t squirrels tell secrets in the forest? Because there are too many eavesdroppers!
How do you make a squirrel laugh? Tell it a corny joke.
What’s a squirrel’s dream job? Being a nutritionist.
What do you call a squirrel in the rain? A wet nut.
Why did the squirrel go to space? To find some star-nuts.
What kind of shoes do squirrels wear? Cashew-al shoes.
What kind of dance do squirrels prefer? The Nutcracker Ballet.
What type of event do squirrels throw? A nut-ty party.
What did the squirrel say after winning the lottery? I’m nuts-rich!
What’s a squirrel’s favorite type of story? A nut-ical tale.
How do you catch a friendly squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
What motivates a squirrel to work out? To stay in peak nut-shape.
Why did the squirrel avoid the library? Too much squirrelly silence!
What did the squirrel do when it found a treasure map? Follow the peanut trail.
Why don’t squirrels play cards in the forest? They’re afraid ofcheetahs.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite ice cream? Rocky road.
How do squirrels celebrate their birthday? With lots of nut-cream cake.
What do squirrels eat for breakfast? Nutflakes.
How did the squirrel fix his broken nutcracker? With a little nut-tape.
What did the squirrel major in at college? Nut-ural sciences.
Why are squirrels so good at acrobatics? They love to be airborne.
Why do squirrels love slim trees? They’re easy to grasp.
How did the squirrel impress his date? With his nut-ural charm.
What type of music do squirrels listen to? Anything with a lot of high notes!
What’s the best way to share a joke with a squirrel? Just nut and say it.
Why did the squirrel attend school? To get a higher tree-gree.
What do you call a squirrel that loves to fight? A squarrel.
Why are squirrels always happy? They believe every day is nut-tiful.
How do squirrels communicate? They use Morse acorn.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite sauce? Peanutbutter.
Why do squirrels hate wind? It messes up their fur style.
Why did the squirrel wear glasses? To improve its nut-sight.
What did the baby squirrel say to its parent? I’m furr-y happy!
Why did the squirrel bring a suitcase to the tree? It was going on a nut-cation.
Why did the squirrel bring a ladder to the bar? To get to the high nuts!
What do you call an attractive squirrel? An acorn babe.
Why don’t squirrels like fast cars? They’re afraid they’ll crack under the pressure.
Why did the squirrel cross the road? To prove it wasn’tchicken.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite dish? Nut roast.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite movie? The Nutty Professor.
How do squirrels avoid getting lost? They always carry a nut-compass.
What did the squirrel say to its significant other? I’m nuts about you!